Day Five: More Dead than Alive, Rocking the Plastic Like a Man From the Catskills

Weight: 201 (I'm being very unscientific by weighing in at night--note that there was little change in 24 hours)

I feel like a failure. When I got to the office I realized there was a board meeting I needed to attend and it was catered. So here is my latest cheat: I ate a veggie wrap that contained only veggies that I could have got from my garden: carrots, cucumber, lettuce, and spinach, all of which I have in my back yard. The cheat comes from a nice pesto sauce within it and the wrap. To compensate, I didn't eat anything else for breakfast or lunch except some rose petals on their last legs.

So why the breach: I like my job. When I read back on my poorly composed posts I think the lack of protein, coupled with stress and limited sleep is affecting my ability to spell and write a coherent sentence. I don't want to let my experiment hurt my livelihood. Bringing backyard weeds to a working lunch would confirm the suspicion of those who might see through me: I'm nuts in more than one way. On top of this, I must confess that "falling off the forage wagon" allowed me to sneak one potato chip when I got home. Just one, but it tasted pretty good: Trader Joe's.

By the way, if you have been following the economic news, my diet, though I lost no real weight today, felt pretty good because I spent zero dollars on food. By the way, in Washington, a burger meal can run you up to ten bones. I used to feel good about getting dollar items at McD's--and I hate that stuff--but I at least feel liberated from the economic burden of consuming comida for sale. The only thing I'm lamenting is all the discarded food I didn't eat out of self-imposed rules. One could try my experiment out but add a freegan element, whereby, the idea is not so much where the food is found but that it cost nothing to obtain.

In other news, my previous post mentioned school lunches. I later learned that in my town, Mukilteo, the schools have a pretty good plan whereby they avoid embarrassing students and separate out those parents who can pay but don't from those in real need. Glad to know that some districts have a reasonable plan.

If you ever want to try this, note that one might experience temporary memory loss with less nourishment, which reminds me that the best members of society don't necessarily succeed in life, but not through a failure of their own will. The problem is, limited nutrition can cause physiological affects that make productivity suffer somewhat. Already, I'm tired and I can imagine becoming too tired to go hike and get food, or rig up my rod and catch it. Note the title: it is from a Beck song. I realize it is meaningless. I'm sure that's the point. But the fact that it came to mind right now is unnerving.

I'm thinking that if I can pull this month off, I might continue if I can take a deer during hunting season. I've never done any real hunting besides one fowl hunt with a colleague, so I have limited hopes in that area. Watch out Bambi.

Before bed, I killed a mosquito eater, an insect flying about the house, and, well, I ate it. Turns out it tastes fine, and I will be disposing of flying pests in this way in the month to come I think. Home debate ensued. The results of our straw poll are thus: son (10) "cool", son (6) "bad move"; wife was horrified: "hard to kiss you after thinking you ate a freaking bug." Minutes after this poll, we found a pretty large spider, which my wife killed (screaming) and threw away (which she never does) so I wouldn't eat it. I was disappointed that my protein lost its life without joining the circle of life.

A mild argument ensued with the family and we took comments for this blog. My son (6) is worried that he might have bad dreams about his dad eating a bug. He said he'd rather me eat worms than bugs. My son (10) is worried that society is crumbling because there is a rap song on the radio that goes "bok bok, chicken head". You tell me which reality is more disturbing!